Can you form a real friendship with someone after a breakup?
In a recent post by Jezebel, “Taking a Break to Be Friends Is the Most Baffling Activity Known to Humankind,” the conversation turns to couples who decide to break up---sometimes without technically calling it that---in order to be friends. Uh huh.
“Friends means we watch Netflix at your apartment and I complain to you about my new relationship. Friendly means that if we pass on the street, I’ll smile and say hi, rather than try to fashion a weapon out of the objects in my handbag.”
“Personally, I believe the only way to truly be friends with a serious ex is if you had already entered the friend zone before the breakup. Because when you end a relationship that’s still sexually charged, or that one person isn’t ready to give up, it’s impossible to hang out afterward without wanting to [screw], marry, or kill each other.”
Hmm. It kind of reminds us of that quote along the lines of, “Getting back with your ex is like taking a shower and then putting the same underwear back on.” Kind of gross -- we know -- but potentially accurate? On the other hand, if you don’t really want your ex to be your ex… is there a reason for that?
What do you think?
Is it ever a good idea to stay friends with an ex? Under what circumstances?
If you are friends with your ex (or exes) is the friendship better than the relationship was… and if so - how/why?
Do you think people who tend to be friends with their exes post-break-up do so for healthy reasons, or simply because they can’t let go?
Art by Beth Hoeckel